Monday, December 22, 2008

inside out braids

this little girl is very dear to me.
her mama was my cousin, my friend.
and every time i look at her face i am reminded of her mother
and how her life was cut short almost two years
ago when she was brutally murdered.
yet another very senseless tragedy,
her death was, for our family,
for these children she left behind.....
there are many shattered,
tattered pieces of broken hearts
left behind.....
and with wounded spirits,
little by little we struggle,
sometimes alone and on this day, together,
to pick up those pieces, trying to make ourselves well again.
trying to make sense out of death and life,
things which we have no power over, yet we still concern ourselves nevertheless.
so the only thing i could come up with is this:
make the effort to fill your days with little acts of great kindness and love.
we cannot control much, but we can control this aspect of ourselves, our lives.
being a mother is hard, there are always so many things to be done,
but we must always pause and take time for the little things.
i can't help but think that when we are gone,
those are the things that will have mattered most.
the day that i was asked by my auntie,
to come and do hair for a very special day,
for a very first piano recital,
i gladly made two inside out braids in the hopes that somehow
that small act would make the day better for both of them and maybe even for me too.
i went home, with my own little daughter in tow, a box full of ribbons on her lap and i thought about how often she is with me, not aloof like the boys kind of are,
always busy with bicycles, rocks and sticks.
and i thought about how this is my legacy to her.
it is the same one that my mother gave to me.
it is a legacy of love and goodness.
the legacy of a Christian life, making good out of evil.
spending the time we are given on this earth doing the will of God,
despite the circumstances which quite often befall us.
some things are consequences of our own choices, others,
simply because they are the will of God.
i once read somewhere that our lives are like the piecing of a quilt.
we sew with what we are given, we don't always have control over
what kind of material we are given.
sometimes the material is less than favorable,
but in the end we can still make something beautiful for God.
so during all of my oh-so-busy days
i will try to remind myself that all of our moments are timeless.
they go with us into to eternity:
every thought, word and deed.
i will try to remind myself that life and each day that we are given is a gift.
the SON is always shining somewhere
and i am so thankful that He came to earth
to share HIS light and
to share with me, with us, HIS legacy of love,
without which,
this life, this world, would be devoid of anything beautiful and good.
and i am thankful that HE has shown me there is
beauty in something as simple as a pair of
inside out braids......