Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Mama Journals and the Bread of Life

Do any of you ladies keep mama journals? If you don't, I really recommend it. I have volumes of notebooks, usually cheap ones from the Dollar Tree, but some are nicer, that I have kept through the years since the birth of my daughter. I can remember talking with my grandmother one day on the phone and she began reminiscing about her child-rearing days. She especially talked a lot about my aunt Ellen who passed away from cancer when I was 14. One of the things she told me was that she wished she had written down more of the memories she had of her children when they were growing, things they'd said, things they'd done. She compelled me to begin keeping the mama journals for the moments that often take my breath away, the moments that are here one minute and then out the door and gone the next.

Each new day ushers in opportunities for me to write things down and while I do not journal every day, I always treasure the times that I do because I often go back and read what I have written and those memories become so vivid and real for me, creating little glimpses back into the days and nights that are the story of us.

Today, with the feast of St. Martin of Tours and Thanksgiving just around the corner, Ithought I would share with you one such journal entry that I found last night. With it I am reminded that even though there are times when it seems like we don't have enough or we don't have the things we'd like to, there is so much to be thankful for. The blessings are there ladies and with a little LIGHT we can see.............

"Today was one of those days where I felt "good" about homeschooling, we watched the Mass on EWTN, we said 3 decades of the Rosary, we were spiritually "fed" and ready to start the day! However, the reality that there is no "food" set in. Cries of not only, "I'm hungry", but, "I'm really hungry", were ringing in my ears and I hadn't even had my cup of coffee yet! So I made my cup of delicious morning blend, sat on "my corner" of the couch and what I saw out the french doors was a sight for sore eyes: I beheld my oldest son, 14 now, sitting in the swing eating dry Rice Krispies, while my youngest son, in his pajamas, holding a bag of BBQ chips, mostly crumbs, pushed him on the swing. The sun was shining and there is food to eat!
You see, the SON was shining and I felt it, for HE can nourish us with even BBQ chips and dry cereal."

Looking back at that day, I can see them in the backyard and even though I don't remember why there was no food, it probably had something to do with our outrageous mortgage payments and not enough work, but the blessings were still there and I was privileged enough to realize them. I was and am privileged because when we go to Mass and receive Holy Communion, "as the Host is dissolved within us, the will of God dissolves our own will." He transforms us as He feeds us. In Holy Communion we receive Him: Body, Blood, Soul and Divinity.This nourishment and feeling of being full lasts far beyond any meal and we carry it with us on a day to day basis.
I don't ever wonder, "How can this man give us His flesh to eat."
Because I know who He is and what I am because of Him, when He says, "THIS IS MY BODY, TAKE IT AND EAT", I know that He will never send me away hungry.